Films so bad they're almost goo … no, they're just really bad

Films so bad they're almost goo … no, they're just really bad

The YP team loves movies, but not all movies are awesome. Some are okay, some are not-so-bad, but here are the ones so AWFUL we wouldn't want you to suffer as we had. Avoid, avoid, avoid! And, you're welcome

We've all done it; found ourselves stuck at a movie that we really don't want to watch. Sometimes we can't just walk out or friends or parents may be disappointed. Prevention is better than cure, the YP team believes, so here are the movies we think you should avoid ...


Alien, Alien again, More Alien, anything with Alien really

When Alien first came out it was shocking and gory and one of those must-see movies. And it was all those things, but seriously, after the alien bursts out of the man's stomach, there's not much else going on. It's just a lot of creeping around on the ship with Sigourney Weaver's character trying to hunt down the alien. The rest of the movies were more of the same. Huge yawn.

Susan Ramsay, Editor

White God 

I understand that the movie is meant to inspire people who have been oppressed to rise up and rebel. The mongrels represent people who have been oppressed and they should put up a fight for themselves. But I find the way they got their message across rather disturbing. I am no dog lover but there were scenes where dogs attack humans, and scenes of dogs being abused. Those are totally unnecessary. My after-movie dinner plans were totally ruined.

Wong Yat-hei, Reporter


I know everyone loves it, but I hated it. Right from the opening scene with the ice cutters singing their song, I knew this was going to be a bad one. I should've stopped watching right then and instead spent two hours riding around town on a bicycle with no seat. It would've been less painful.

Sam Gusway, Sub-editor

Full Strike (now in cinemas if you wish to experience a truly terrible movie)

Full Strike is a rip-off of Shaolin Soccer, but with badminton. It tells the story of a band of misfits who try to redeem themselves by playing badminton, but the comedy scenes aren't funny at all. One of the supposed jokes is when a person projectile vomits in another person's face. Shaolin Soccer did the exact same trick back in 2001, and that was an original and entertaining comedy. Full Strike is just a copy of that, and is not at all funny.

Alan Yu, Reporter

In honour of World Book Day, and because we're a team of avid readers, Young Post got together to talk about their favourite characters


It's just so unlikely and pointless. WHY does the lead guy have an Aussie accent if he's an American soldier? A simple reference to growing up as an army brat in Adelaide would've been enough. HOW did they turn everyone against the environment? I left almost wanting to ... chop down a tree or something. And the ear waggling was just ridiculous - at least I was laughing so hard at every tiny wiggle, I didn't pay attention to the ridiculously awful script. If it weren't for Sigourney Weaver's awesomeness, I would've left after 15 minutes.

Karly Cox, Deputy Editor

Happy Gilmore

Anything with Adam Sandler in it is going to be terrible. On top of that, golf isn't even that fun to play, never mind watch, so I don't know why anyone thought it was a good idea to make an entire movie about golf. And the main character is called Happy - happy is an adjective, it's not a name. And who could really pick up a golf club for the first time and then go on to win a professional competition? Exactly. That's just one of the many unrealistic plot holes in the film.

Lucy Christie, Sub-editor


As much as I still love Johnny Depp, I must say this was a total flop. The only reason I didn't leave the cinema was because I had to write a review for it, and I had faint hope that somehow the film would redeem itself. It didn't. Depp was annoying and awkward in his portrayal of the title character, an art dealer with a twitching moustache you just want to shave off. And Depp's manservant is crushed multiple times, but he just refuses to die. This was frustrating, because if he did die I'm sure the film would have ended much earlier. 

Melanie Leung, Reporter

The Dark Knight

The music, The Joker, that motorbike scene, and most parts of the film were amazing, but Maggie Gyllenhaal ruined it for me. Gosh, she's just so darn ugly. The most unrealistic part of the movie was Harvey Dent and Batman fighting over her lol. 

John Kang, Junior Reporters' Club manager

This article appeared in the Young Post print edition as
So bad we wish we hadn't


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Carla Thomas


I used this article recently to teach one of my primary level classes (ages 8-9) in journalism about reviews, and how to write them. I was disgusted when I got to the last review, and felt sorry for all the girls in my class who were unfortunately subject to it. How utterly narrow-minded, ignorant, and ****ist do you have to be to reduce a woman, Maggie Gyllenhaal, down to her looks like that. She's a great actress, has great talent, and has been successful in her career. Yet all John Kang can do is talk about how he finds her ugly? It's not witty or funny (though I saw you included a LOL in there, top-notch writing, John!) - saying a film was ruined for you because you thought a woman was unattractive means you're a bad and unimaginative writer. You're grasping at straws to find anything relevant to say about something, and you failed miserably here. This is an offensive review, and I'm truly sorry for any young female Young Post readers who come across it and think that it's ever okay for any young woman out there to be reduced down to their looks.

william worth


Movies are the best source to get rid from stress and tiredness. I also used it to get some refreshment or entertainment on different sources like But some movies are harmful for child like horror movies. Adults limit their child from watching horror films in order to avoid trauma. It is not always an adult can withstand the constant tension in the frame-by-frame, massacre, violence, or horrific invented characters. Horror, primarily evoke a sense of fear. Fear is a negative emotion. Per-view picture of a man thinking about the threat of his life and produced inside the adrenaline, which in consequence may be physically or emotionally throw. Some horror films have been banned in many countries, because of which after seeing the increased percentage of violence among adolescents.