1. Okay, that’s the climbing up a ladder with the snapping dinosaur grabbing your sneaker trope out of the way.
2. Woah that was like a highlights reel from all the rest of the movies. Can’t wait to see what they have that’s new.
3. Oh, cool, erupting volcano.
4. Oh look, people escaping up the ladder with a dinosaur snapping at their sneakers...
5. So...the old dude’s got this island and he wants to put the dinosaurs on it, what about those things in the water. How will he keep them around the island?
6. Wow, what are all those military-people doing there? I hope they’re not going to act like military characters in every movie like this and harm the dino... oh... darn.
7. Nope, that’s not how tranquillisers work. Nope. That just looks stupid.
8. Okay that’s the dinosaur snot shot out of the way.
9. That’s a cool volcano eruption.
10. Wait, wait you want to do WHAT?
11. Kid, call 911! I dare you! Call 911! Jeez, not even a smartphone?
12. Umm... so you’re an ancient, super rich, bed-ridden oxygen-dependent-wheelchair-bound man, apparently in full control of your considerable intellect, but you think it’s a good idea to confront your evil servant, who has literally done the worst freaking thing ever - in private?
13. Another snot shot. It’s like they have a check list of “must happen” scenes
14. Oh look people escaping up the ladder with a dinosaur snapping at their sneakers
15. KID CALL 911! Don’t you ever watch TV?
16. Why do all rich folks have black cars.