New Year's resolutions

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Mr Messy and Miss Lazy want to change their ways.

John Millen |
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Mr Messy: I’ve made up my mind to tidy up my life. I’m so messy and disorganised. It’s definitely my biggest shortcoming. I’m going to make a start this weekend by tidying up my bedroom. It’s the untidiest room in the flat. There are clothes all over the place - even on the floor.  


I'm going to get rid of all the clutter in my wardrobe, in the drawers and the cupboards.  I’m afraid I’m a great hoarder. I never throw anything away.  Magazines, old notebooks, photographs.

Every storage space in my bedroom is full of old rubbish. It’s all going in bin bags, and then I will sort my clothes out. Anything I haven’t worn during the past year is going to charity.

Miss Lazy: I wish you good luck with all that. My new year’s resolutions is to move more this weekend, I’m going on a hike with the walking group I’ve joined.  

Mr Messy: A hike?  In this cold weather?

Miss Lazy: The weather doesn’t matter.  I am going to do a long hike once a month. In fact, I have joined three different walking groups.

Mr Messy: You won’t enjoy it. I know you prefer to sit on the sofa and watch TV. I can’t see you lasting past the first hike.

Miss Lazy: Nonsense!  Once I’ve made up my mind to do something, I do it. I’m lazy, but once I start something, I am not a quitter. I’m leaving the lazy old me behind. You wait and see.

Mr Messy: One hike a month isn’t exactly the height of physical activity.

Miss Lazy: I haven’t finished telling you about the new me yet! I’ve joined a gym and I intend to go twice a week after work. I’ve paid for a personal trainer, and I don’t intend to waste that money. I have booked six sessions with her.

Mr Messy: She will have her work cut out motivating you.

Miss Lazy: Thanks for being so supportive! Next month I intend to pay you a surprise visit one weekend to see how tidy your flat is.

Mr Messy: No problem!  Every room in the flat will be tidy and spotlessly clean. You will be able to eat your dinner off the floor.

Miss Lazy: Ha ha! The last time I came round, everything was so messy and disorganised that you couldn’t even find a clean plate for the noodles I’d brought from the Thai Cafe.

Mr Messy: That was then, but this is now. My messy days are over. I’m going to stay at home for the next couple of weekends     and give my flat a good blitz.

Miss Lazy: And at work, I intend to take the stairs instead of the lift. My office is only on the second floor. Plus I’ve got an app on my watch that counts the number of steps I take each day. I aim to do ten thousand steps, five days a week.

Mr Messy: We’re both full of good intentions. Let’s hope we manage to stick to them.

Miss Lazy: I think we’ve done the first difficult bit. Me admitting I’m lazy and you admitting you’re messy. Good luck to both of us! Bye bye Miss Lazy and Mr Messy. Hello Miss Active and Mr Organised.

 

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